Sunday, September 20, 2009

Be Careful What You Kiss For...

Be Careful What You Kiss For...
By
Andrew Macdowell

Do you know how tough it is to catch a cold when you actually want one? Somehow, being a popular guy in school, I allowed myself to get talked into trying out for a school play. I didn't think I had any talent, unfortunately, the drama teacher thought otherwise and not only was I now in the play, I had the lead.

The closer the performances got, the more nervous I became until I talked myself into finding a way out of it. I did everything I could think of to get out of it. I tried causing trouble at home in hopes I would get punished. I also tried to do things in school which would suspend my extra circular activities but, nothing was working! I guess everyone really did like me.

A week to go to the school play and I was having extreme anxiety attacks. Then I walked into math class and heard someone in back of me sniffling and occasionally blowing their nose. After class I turned around to find out who had the cold. Keeping my fingers crossed it was a girl, I was in luck. I could see she was really, really sick and probably should have stayed home that day. Granted, she wasn't one of the cool kids and normally I never would have asked this girl out but, I needed her cold and I needed it then and there.

So, me, being a self centered jock at the time begged and pleaded until she agreed to go out with me that day. And then I went to work. I made sure we drank out of the same glass, I picked up dirty tissues, and, most of all I made sure we kissed. I mean really kissed so germs could transfer to me.

The next morning I woke up to find out nothing happened. Not a sneeze, not a runny nose, not even a sore throat. I ran to school trying to find my little sick girl, I had to try again, time was running out. I began asking the unpopular kids where my little sick girl was - amazed that the rumor I took this girl out was true, they were all to happy to tell me she was home sick. So during lunch I called her to make sure it was ok that I come over after school.

As the rumors grew and I got more and more harassed by the other popular kids for going out with the "geeky girl" with the cold, I got more and more desperate to get sick. It was raining that day so I made sure I got my feet and head wet. I went over to the sick girl's house and was glad when her mother opened the door for me and told me that she too had a bad cold. JACKPOT. Or so I thought.

I went come confident I caught a cold. Next day I woke up - NOTHING again. I did this all week. It was clear I wasn't going to get sick and I was going to be forced to through with the play. Somehow I got through the school play that Friday and Saturday and was actually hailed as a "fine actor" and someone to watch in the future.

Thankful that was over I could concentrate on sports once again. I had try-outs coming up for the basketball team on Monday, and, I didn't think I'd have any problems. I was a natural at the game and my height clearly gave me an advantage. And then on Sunday it happened. I woke up with a sore throat and by Monday I felt awful and running a fever of 101.1 and sneezing and coughing like crazy. Not only didn't I get to school that day (actually all week) because I was so sick, I wasn't allowed a make-up try out for the basketball team.

Moral of the story? Be careful what you kiss for...

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